My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
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