What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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