no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
