carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
