Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
