Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
