Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
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