can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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