We won't sleep together?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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