): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Boobs are out for the taking
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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