I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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