Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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