Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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