My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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