I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
