whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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