Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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