that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
