I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
