They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
