She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
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I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
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I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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