I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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