Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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