Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
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