too bad you live with your parents still
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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