I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
