i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
he was CRYING into my vagina
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
