He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize