Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
