So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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