I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
