Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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