Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  the condom got lost in my hair

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  (281): the condom got lost in my hair http://tfl.nu/z469
  Replies (6) Good night (624) Bad night (3258)
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  (310): View more from California

  kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.

  (1-310): View more from California

  damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.

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  (310): kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley. (1-310): damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now. http://tfl.nu/1545
  Replies (65) Good night (2589) Bad night (3520)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.

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  (206): Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio. http://tfl.nu/95rn
  Replies (30) Good night (7023) Bad night (1072)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.

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  (816): Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same. http://tfl.nu/qpk7
  Replies (28) Good night (828) Bad night (4065)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.

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  (803): Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine. http://tfl.nu/e72g
  Replies (25) Good night (8512) Bad night (1101)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole

  (1-613): View more from Ontario

  im not talking about this

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  (613): it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole (1-613): im not talking about this http://tfl.nu/ufkd
  Replies (10) Good night (1032) Bad night (3573)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.

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  (425): i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life. http://tfl.nu/aawj
  Replies (15) Good night (1796) Bad night (5328)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock

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  (713): I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock http://tfl.nu/svlq
  Replies (8) Good night (1205) Bad night (3380)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.

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  (907): You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn. http://tfl.nu/73y5
  Replies (6) Good night (2357) Bad night (1117)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.

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  (561): She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess. http://tfl.nu/v7az
  Replies (5) Good night (2403) Bad night (1013)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.

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  (757): almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight. http://tfl.nu/a50k
  Replies (7) Good night (2993) Bad night (755)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Omg I think I'm in the wrong class

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  (519): I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning (519): Omg I think I'm in the wrong class http://tfl.nu/znqx
  Replies (11) Good night (3948) Bad night (730)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.

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  (781): My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning. http://tfl.nu/4mpl
  Replies (1) Good night (1191) Bad night (477)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE

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  (443): Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE http://tfl.nu/kvc0
  Replies (9) Good night (1166) Bad night (411)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.

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  (904): Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown. http://tfl.nu/099k
  Replies (3) Good night (592) Bad night (297)

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