cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
handjob tips. give me some.
time to smoke my breakfast
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
