I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
