Jerry, you need to find god
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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