kristin has been a bad kristin
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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