What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
