You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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