Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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