That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
