Where is the hickey?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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