Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
