Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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