I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
