So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
