Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
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