My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
