He had one of those small greek statue penises
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
