STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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