Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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